John Rothwell left this year's Roses in the Ocean Lived Experience Summit in Brisbane with something he hadn't expected - a renewed sense of hope.
Hope for the future of suicide prevention, especially in the regional areas of North Queensland, and for a growing movement led by those who've walked the darkest paths and are now helping to light the way forward.
As a suicide attempt survivor, Mr Rothwell said the Summit showcased the growing role of lived experience in suicide prevention.
"Those who have experienced all-consuming distress know that everyone in that world is uplifted when we can come together and reduce that hurt," he said.
"Lived experience of suicide is a growing movement with others who really 'get it'. I believe together we will make a positive difference to peoples' lives."
Mr Rothwell has survived multiple attempts to end his life; each one, he said, was preceded by a sense of surety that his suffering was "permanent and emotionally unsurvivable".
"I didn't quite know that in each case the thoughts impelling me to take my life were not even my own, but rather they were an inevitable response to immense psychological suffering," he said.
"In my case, the experience of suicidal thinking was one of extreme isolation and despair - and these two factors fed off each other.
"The more isolated I was and stuck with my own with dark thoughts, the deeper into despair I fell.
"I found that talking about feeling suicidal with others who understand may not have immediately made the feelings go away, but it took away the focused intensity and the fixation on suicide."
That's why Mr Rothwell believes it's important to shine a light on the role lived experience plays in suicide prevention.
"Lived experience offers empathy and a person-to-person approach that allows people to feel seen and heard, and have their experiences validated," he said.
"It can also serve as a lifeline among peers who are struggling by sharing their real-world experiences, strategies, and techniques that have helped them."
Mr Rothwell said there was a real need for people with lived experience to come together - and that's what the Summit achieved.
"The Summit showcased the latest advances in suicide prevention and a wide variety of others' experiences and perspectives," he said.
"I was fortunate to meet people working in the suicide prevention space, while also sharing my voice and perspectives to the many conversations and workshops."
Northern Queensland Primary Health Network (NQPHN) provided a bursary for Mr Rothwell to attend the Roses in the Ocean Lived Experience Summit, which brought together people with lived experience of suicide, researchers, service providers, government, and community organisations to explore new ideas in suicide prevention, future partnerships, lived experience connection, and ways to work together.
