Instead of searching for "Mr. Right", Bridget Jones would have been better off focusing on herself, according to a new Simon Fraser University study on singlehood.
As more people actively choose a single life, or delay getting into romantic relationships, SFU researchers have found that people who embrace singlehood can be more satisfied with their lives than those who view being single as a flaw.
The findings suggest that singlehood can be an important time for personal growth with mentality playing a vital role in building positive outcomes.
"Romantic relationships are no longer seen as the key to having a happy and successful life," says Elina Moreno, who carried out the research as a social-personality undergraduate research mentee at SFU.
"We wanted to find out what singlehood looks like, what activities single people are engaging in, and what benefits they can get from those activities.
"What we found is that people who believe that singlehood offers them the opportunity to self-expand are more likely to pursue activities that lead to personal growth.
"By placing yourself in new situations, like trying a new restaurant, taking on a new sport or travelling to a new country, you're learning how to act and react to new environments, and feeling more competent and comfortable in yourself in the process."
The study, published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, suggests that people who embrace singlehood may be:
More likely to be satisfied with being single
Have a higher life satisfaction
Less afraid of being single
More likely to feel autonomous, competent and connected to others
In contrast, people who view being in a relationship as key to a happy life, who have lower self-esteem, or are involuntarily single, are less likely to see singlehood as a chance for self-growth.
"Our findings suggest that people who were involuntarily single would be less likely to see singlehood as a chance to try new experiences, so they may not experience the same benefits as someone who takes advantage of the benefits of singlehood," says Moreno.
"But that's not to say that they cannot self-expand or engage with these activities, it might just take more effort."
Among the most common activities that people found to be beneficial were: physical activities and sports, socializing, parties, dining out, achieving career goals, holidays and shopping.
The study suggests that single people mostly take part in self-expanding activities with other people, such as with friends (50 per cent) and family (22 per cent).
But researchers also found that single people reported doing activities alone 18 per cent of the time.
"When one in five people are doing an activity alone, it suggests that solitude can help to clarify things about themselves, and that when solitude is chosen and wanted, it can be a fruitful vehicle for self-expansion," says Yuthika Girme, senior researcher and associate professor, psychology.
The idea of self-expansion has been around for many decades, but most of the research has focused on self-expansion in romantic relationships.
As more people spend a longer amount of time being single, or re-enter singlehood later in life, researchers felt there was a gap in research that needed to be addressed.
"I don't think we're seeing more people opting out of romantic relationships altogether, rather, people are delaying those committed relationships," says Girme, who supervised the research.
"There's very little research on single individuals and people's experience of being single, so this research is really important because it is so understudied."
The research consisted of three studies involving around 600 participants, aged between 17 and 76, from Canada and the US.
SFU researchers were keen to point out that the findings do not suggest that single people are necessarily happier than people in romantic relationships, or that people should abandon their quest for wanting a romantic relationship. Rather, it is down to the individual to make the most of their time being single.
"I think the big thing to take away from this study is that mindset really matters," says Girme.
"How we see our reality is important in shaping the way we think about what we experience.
"For single individuals, that mindset is even more important because for a lot of people, singlehood can be challenging or frustrating.
"So thinking about singlehood as an opportunity allows people to reframe that experience, which can ultimately shape how they think and feel about singlehood and how they shape their outcomes."
AVAILABLE SFU EXPERTS
ELINA MORENO, former SFU social-personality undergraduate research (SPUR) mentee, current doctoral student at the University of Toronto
YUTHIKA GIRME, senior researcher and associate professor, psychology
