"I feel like I'm about to lose control, but I just need to focus on surviving the day. I'm holding on and setting small goals to get through it."
These were my exact words to myself the other day. I was struggling to keep up with the intensity of life and my emotions, which were overpowering me at the time.
This wasn't the first time I had experienced something like this. As a student who has experienced a series of unfortunate, traumatic events in life while trying to keep up with schoolwork, this was my well-trained brain trying to get me out of survival mode and into growth mode.
When life feels too much…
I have learned that many times in life, things can happen that are out of my control, like car accidents, harassment and discrimination, the world failing to empathize with your weirdness and much more.
Despite all the challenges, this is how I can take charge of what needs to be done to take care of myself when everything feels so intense.
Step 1: Anchor the mind.
Part of the process is acknowledging that this tiny little life moment is just a moment of suffering, rather than overexaggerating it as an everlasting disaster. Truly, nothing in life is ever permanent. So why would I give this trauma the power it doesn't deserve? It's just a temporary moment.
Step 2: Anchor the body.
Once I have anchored down mentally, I need to anchor my body to a calmer sense of being. Believe it or not, going through tough days and stress can affect your heart rate, body temperature and grounding state. I love to give myself a heavy blanket to wrap around, water to cool down and a scented roll-on with a cool minty smell to soothe any pain and ground me.
Step 3: Start with small wins.
Regaining my mental and physical strength means I can use them to my advantage to plan my small goals and wins. I like to start with the basics: making sure I'm eating, drinking water and doing a bit of exercise. I like making exercise fun! If I can't do badminton by myself, I just do twenty jumping jacks to get some heat going before moving on. Taking it a step further, I can plan what to prioritize for the day with a mix of fun things to preserve my happy self. For example, that day I decided to prioritize getting some research work done and buying myself a sweet drink to keep hydrated. Little actions build a foundation for growth and empowerment.
Redefining my story
One key thing I have learned in this process is to start redefining my story. Instead of being a student who couldn't complete her degree in four perfect years, I'm a student who took her time to balance health with school while gaining relevant work experience and giving back to the community and people she cares about.
This is our glimmer.
This is a glimmer of defiance against my struggles and trauma. I refuse to let these unfortunate events break me entirely. I continue to uplift myself through survival mode and pursue my growth in hopes of one day supporting someone like me.
If you, as a student, feel like the world around you has been falling into chaos or if you are having difficulties anchoring yourself, then give yourself permission to rewrite your own story and take back control with kindness.
