A new study on women's sexual experiences has challenged the commonly-held belief that reaching orgasm during sex is the single, essential indicator of a successful sexual encounter or a satisfying sexual relationship.
The research, published in the International Journal of Sexual Health, found that while women's orgasms are connected to their sexual relationship satisfaction, reaching orgasm every single time isn't necessary.
The study surveyed women in Aotearoa/New Zealand and found a fascinating pattern - sexual relationship satisfaction is positively correlated with how consistently a woman orgasms, but only up to a certain point. Women who orgasmed often reported high satisfaction, but those who orgasmed almost always or always didn't necessarily report even higher satisfaction.
This finding goes against the popular idea, often seen in media and pornography, that orgasm is the main goal of sex and necessary every time for a satisfying sex life - a concept sometimes called the "orgasm imperative".
Importantly, the study also found that non-orgasmic factors played a significant role in women's sexual relationship satisfaction. How often couples had sex, how important sex was to the woman, and even her age were strong predictors of satisfaction.
When these factors were considered alongside orgasm consistency, the non-orgasmic elements added significant power to explaining women's satisfaction levels. This suggests that sex offers benefits beyond just the physical experience of orgasm including affection, sensuality and intimacy, which are highly valued.
"Sadly, recent media coverage about our study has been inaccurate - while more frequent sex is linked to higher relationship satisfaction, this could just as likely be because those in more satisfying relationships tend to have sex more often - not that increasing frequency alone will necessarily boost happiness. Therapeutic interventions therefore need to focus on exploring any underlying dynamics and barriers to intimacy, rather than just encouraging people to increase frequency."
These findings align with similar studies conducted in other Western populations, suggesting these insights are likely applicable beyond Aotearoa/New Zealand. For sex and relationship therapists, the research suggests that focusing on interventions that increase the frequency of sex and/or improve orgasm consistency (rather than aiming for 100% every time) may be more beneficial for helping women improve their sexual relationship satisfaction - however, the authors highlight that this requires further research.
Ultimately, removing the pressure and goal-oriented mindset around orgasm may enhance both sexual pleasure and overall satisfaction.
